工程師大學時期必經的 35 件事－

35 Things Every Engineer Has To Deal With In College

                                                                                         Posted by Julia Zarina
克里斯無責任翻譯：

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1. Finishing an essay for a liberal arts class and realizing that you’re drastically under the page requirement.
（好不容易完成一篇文科的報告，卻發現頁數遠遠不及老師的要求。）
我要把自己知道的所有詞彙都打進去！沒關係，你可以說：「我這是講求效率！」

2. Getting your first exam back after thinking you could study for it like you studied for tests in high school.

（出席第一場考試前，覺得自己可以用高中時代的方法準備考試。）

對，你失敗了。

3. And then waking up extremely disoriented from an accidental nap in the lab. Because you pulled two consecutive all-nighters studying for your next one.

靠！現在是西元幾年？

4. Your code/report/major project is due soon and is not, in any way, working like it’s supposed to.

期限倒數 10 小時：）

開始恐慌吧！

Five hours before the deadline:
（期限倒數五小時：）

ＷＴＦ。。。

An hour before the deadline:
（期限倒數最後一小時：）

ＧＯＤ　ＤＡＭＮ　Ｓ。。。就這樣吧。

Presenting it to your professor:
（對你的教授簡報時：）

我想大概有 百分之60 的機會，它每次(應該)都能 執行！

5. Somebody casually mentioning they really enjoyed a class that single-handedly destroyed your social life, self-esteem, and GPA in one nightmarish swoop.

沒有冒犯的意思，但你是這世界上讓我感到最不爽的所有事物的代表。

6. Developing a finely tuned sense of hearing that can recognize the words “free food” being spoken from anywhere within a 100-foot radius.

7. The periodic realization that you’ve been working on the same lab report for seven consecutive hours and you’re nowhere near the end.

我覺得自己像是吃錯藥了！(發狂ing)

8. All of your family and friends suddenly require your advice on how to do anything remotely related to household repairs or math.

我不知道為什麼任何人都以為我有那個能力去處理這些事!?

9. Which you feel smart about… Until you’re forced to do a project in some archaic coding language you’re pretty sure was delivered to Earth on a stone tablet from an alien planet where NOTHING MAKES ANY SENSE.

But really.

啜泣....拜託讓我死了吧...

但真的是這樣...

10. Although you finally get your code to work for reasons that remain completely unknown to you.

Yahoo！我是全世界現存最聰明的人！(歇斯底里ing)

11. You’ve had the professor who literally wrote the book on electrical engineering yet has not mastered the complex science of turning on the overhead projector without a major incident.

(你的教授可以洋洋灑灑寫一本電子工程專書，卻連開個投影機都會遭遇重大事故（教授：同學有人是資管系或資工系的嗎？幫老師開一下投影機）。

有電腦工程碩士&博士學位的人，卻用手寫透明投影片!! WTF.....

12. And the professor who built the lunar module, developed a lifesaving medical device, or made some other dauntingly significant contribution to humanity.

全能的神阿...我發誓是真的。

13. People in your humanities classes talk about their plans to go out to the bars on an average Tuesday when YOU SPENT YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY IN THE COMPUTER LAB, DAMN IT.

14. Although you do really take pride in your work ethic, despite your complaining.

還是該把這爛攤子解決的時候了....

15. You’re slightly delighted when that one overzealous kid in your 8 a.m. lecture finally answers a professor’s question incorrectly.
(班上一位雞婆的小鬼頭終於在早上八點的課答錯教授的問題時，你覺得那是生活中的小確幸。)

Sorry, it’s just too early for that.
(抱歉，這還太早了)

16. Nothing in life escalates quite as quickly as the level of material taught during syllabus week.

第一天 概念
Day 2:

第二天 實戰運用....

17. You’re filled with an impending sense of doom when you realize that each of the three questions on your homework set has multiple, lettered parts to it.

不解釋XDD

18. Most of your exams end up pretty much the same way.

我很確定該怎麼做!


不過從大多數的實際情況來看，我並不知道...該怎麼做.....

19. And you’ve turned in a final or two that covered nothing you ever studied in class.

But you felt much better about your life a week later when you found out that the average was a 35%.
(不過考完試一週後，你發現全班平均是 35 分，頓時心情好多了。)

20. Although you know there’s no fiercer moment than an “I just ACED that test” moment.

WOW~誰是世界之王阿!?

21. You partially believe the common (if not blatantly incorrect) perception that your friends in non-science majors don’t do any actual work.

We’re 99% sure that this is an accurate representation of most fine arts classes.
(我們有 99% 的把握，這張圖代表大多數的藝術類課程。)

22. You can literally solve partial differentials in your sleep.

And you don’t know whether to laugh or cry about it.
(雖然你不知道這樣是該哭還是該笑。)

23. If you’re female, you’ve been the only girl in a class of 50 at least once in your college career.

圖片內容不解釋XDD
And rocked it.
(而且妳表現超好!)

24. If you’re male, you’ve seriously wondered whether girls are, in fact, largely mythical.

從左至右的女生 是 美術→科學→工程科

404 NOT FOUND 不需要我解釋吧XD

25. A four-plus-hour lab class is somehow worth one credit.

Does not compute.
(想得美!不列入計算。)

26. Engineers have no social skills, you say?

感謝你們那無用的建議!  甘你屁事!

27. Although you can kind of see the point.

And you’ve definitely been to a few parties that closely resembled this:
(而且你肯定參加過幾場類似這樣的派對：)

(那三小!?)

28. You have a designated table in the library and are pretty territorial about it.

屬於自己的孤僻堡壘!

29. Somebody suggests you eat a meal with some semblance of nutritional balance. Or anything that’s not pizza, really.

根本沒有人有空好嗎!?

30. You’ve made formula sheets that could probably be considered pieces of fine art.

DAMN...

31. You’ve had at least one semester that started out manageable but quickly got away from you.

(It was probably the same semester your friends tried to warn you that taking 18 credits AND having a job was going to be a bad time.)
（那個學期，大概就是朋友警告你別同時修 18 學分又去工作的學期）

小子，歡迎來到這個痛苦的世界。

32. It doesn’t really matter, though, because toward the end of ANY semester, sleep (and a bed consisting of something other than your face on a keyboard) is for the weak.

過去這四天我可是只睡四小時唷!

33. You hear endless stories from the old-school engineers at your summer internship who “didn’t have computers/calculators/electricity” back when they were in school.

Technological progress is kinda the POINT of engineering, bro.
(技術進步就是工程學的重點好嗎？老兄。)

34. You know firsthand what people are talking about when they say an engineering education is a huge investment.

告訴你，我最近收到學貸帳單了，我只哭了二十分鐘。

And we’re not just talking about money.
(我們可不是只談錢而已!DAMN IT!)

35. But you’re doing what you love, and can’t imagine it any other way.

Besides, once you walk across that stage with your degree, is there anything you CAN’T do?
(此外，一旦你撐過這個階段拿到學位，有什麼你不能做的？)

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